WTF, America?

I am temporarily shelving my title of Angry Brown Girl… To be replaced with Disgusted and Saddened Brown Girl.

This should really exist.

Have you heard about the kid at Rutgers, Tyler Clementi, that killed himself? This happened last week, after his roommate & his roommate’s friend (Dharun Ravi, and fellow Rutgers freshman Molly Wei) broadcast a video of Clementi hooking up with a man. This story breaks my heart.

I’m not going to get into the hate crime aspect of it… Rather, I want to focus on WHY Ravi & Wei thought this would be okay. Ravi set up his computer to record and broadcast Tyler and his companion hooking up–WHY?? In what circumstance is this okay? Was Ravi bullying Tyler? Did he not like Tyler? I don’t know… But what made Ravi think that he should live-stream Tyler and his date? Was he proud of himself? That’s how I interpreted it, after reading some of his tweets leading up to the day of Tyler’s suicide.

The Today Show on NBC covered this story this morning, and it was said that the suspects were at home with their families, and that Ravi was ‘confused’ and ‘upset’. What is so ‘confusing’ and ‘upsetting’, Dharun Ravi? YOU chose to tweet (you can view DR’s last few tweets here) and then BROADCAST your roommate having sex with another man… TWICE. Your roommate, who may or may not have been open about his sexuality, then jumped off of the George Washington Bridge. You’re ‘CONFUSED’?! YOU BULLIED someone… And (I believe) your actions led to his SUICIDE. And you’re ‘confused’. Give me a f*cking break. Take responsibility for the fact that you acted like a sociopath.

You know what sucks? This insensitive prick, Dharun Ravi, is of Indian descent. I look to be proud of my kinspeople, and I am disgusted to have anything in common with you. And what does your family think? I hope that they can live with the fact that they have YOU as a son.

Otherwise… You have broken two families, Dharun Ravi. You disgust me as a human being, a ‘man’, and a person of Indian descent. I can only wonder how you have hurt people in the past.

Thank you for reading my rant… What do you think about this case? I would like to know your thoughts.

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4 comments on “WTF, America?

  1. Nimzy N says:

    I agree with you that there is no reason this kid (Dharun) should be confused. I am appalled and saddened that a single person was able to cause such hurt and behaviour.
    I wonder if the victim hadn’t taken his life if the bullying would’ve gotten as much attention as it is.
    I know it’s atrocious that someone was pushed to such limits, but even while he was alive and this was going on- I’d like to know how things were being looked into…

  2. sitaji says:

    Nice rant, this story is just so awful, and full of sorrow.I am wondering how Ravi’s mind worked, and do know that more and more brain research is showing the the brain is not “done” until into the 20s and though it’s no excuse, it’s a consideration. I don’t quite buy this idea, since even as a kid I’d get riled up over seeing bullying and didn’t think immaturity was any excuse to act cruel, but I think there is some science to back up that the brain is still working on developing in someone Ravi’s age. I can’t find anything exactly online right now, but I do remember learning that compassion and empathy is sometimes late in developing in some people, this is fairly close :

    “But another part of the brain — the cerebellum, in the back of the brain — is not very genetically controlled. Identical twins’ cerebellum are no more alike than non-identical twins. So we think this part of the brain is very susceptible to the environment. And interestingly, it’s a part of the brain that changes most during the teen years. This part of the brain has not finished growing well into the early 20s, even. The cerebellum used to be thought to be involved in the coordination of our muscles. So if your cerebellum is working well, you were graceful, a good dancer, a good athlete. But we now know it’s also involved in coordination of our cognitive processes, our thinking processes. Just like one can be physically clumsy, one can be kind of mentally clumsy. And this ability to smooth out all the different intellectual processes to navigate the complicated social life of the teen and to get through these things smoothly and gracefully instead of lurching … seems to be a function of the cerebellum.”

    (source: http://www.pbs.org/wgbh/pages/frontline/shows/teenbrain/interviews/giedd.html)

    Anyway, it’s why there are different ramifications for laws for juveniles, they’re considered not able yet to fully grasp the implications of their actions, and I suppose newer brain research may move that age of maturity up to an even older age than 18. We can be sure that Ravi has also ruined his own life and really messed up his family and friends’ lives too. It’s very tragic, but hopefully something good will come of this all with more enlightenment and ultimately greater compassion reigning after this tragedy.

  3. Honey says:

    Well put, Miss!

    I was very appalled to hear that a youth of Indian descent was involved. Being a minority myself, I believed that people of colour would always be particularly sensitive and apathetic to those in the LGBTQ community who are still fighting for their right to marry, employment and healthcare because we too have struggled.

    I hope this Ravi is punished accordingly, and spends his youth and adulthood remembering Tyler and knowing that no one will ever forget his vile act.

  4. sitaji says:

    Here’s a movie on a similar subject based in India. The NRI filmmaker was inspired to make the film after reading a story in a newspaper from India about a young woman’s suicide.

    http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sancharam_(film)

    http://www.afterellen.com/People/2005/7/ligy.html

    “She says the situation is so severe in India that it is not unheard of for young women to end their own lives after being exposed as lesbians. “These stories are sometimes reported in newspapers,” she explains in my recent interview with her, “but most go unreported, as the surviving family members have an interest in keeping the shame and scandal fallout to a minimum.” She adds that such incidents are so frequent that there is even a watchdog organization in Kerala that keeps track. These tragedies inspired Pullappally to offer a positive representation of queer identity through a popular medium that has the potential to reach a wide audience. The Journey is the first film out of India to seriously address lesbian love since Fire in 1996. While Fire is ultimately affirming, Pullappally was intent on taking it one step further. She wanted to make a film where the women choose each other out of love, as opposed to something to fall back on after they become disillusioned with heterosexual relationships. She wanted to portray heterosexual relationships as expected and imposed by family, but ultimately not satisfying in that they lack the qualities of a lesbian relationship–as opposed to the other way around.” Source: http://www.afterellen.com/Movies/2005/7/thejourney.html

    You have to change your blog post title to “WTF, World?” now. 🙂

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